The Weight of Rejection:
The Mental Health Toll on Transgender and Nonbinary Youth When Their Government Turns Its Backs

Resilience is a defining trait of transgender and nonbinary youth. They persist in living authentically despite the challenges they face at home, in school, and in society. But resilience has its limits, and when the very institutions meant to serve and protect them become hostile, the consequences are dire.

The current socio-political climate has made it clear to many transgender and nonbinary youth that their government sees them as unworthy of protection, dignity, and rights. Already, this message has had a devastating impact on their mental health, leading to increased rates of anxiety, depression, and suicide.

The Crisis at Hand

At TransFamily Support Services (TFSS), we work with transgender and nonbinary youth and their families every day, witnessing firsthand the emotional toll of the current governmental hostility.

Policies that restrict access to gender-affirming healthcare, remove LGBTQ+ books from schools, and deny transgender youth access to bathrooms, locker rooms, and sports teams that align with their gender identity are not just political maneuvers — they are life-threatening decisions.

According to The Trevor Project’s 2023 National Survey on LGBTQ Youth Mental Health, 41% of LGBTQ+ young people seriously considered suicide in the past year, with higher rates among transgender and nonbinary youth.

Those who reported feeling supported by their families and communities had significantly lower suicide risk. This underscores the importance of affirming spaces — so what happens when institutions that should provide safety and support actively contribute to harm?

The Role of the Military and Veterans in Shaping a Safer Future

TFSS serves youth and families, including those within military settings, and we recognize the profound impact that service members, veterans, and their families have in shaping national conversations.

The U.S. military has long been a reflection of societal attitudes. While transgender and nonbinary rights within the armed forces briefly improved in recent years, trans and nonbinary service members and veterans continue to face unique struggles. The recent executive order excluding transgender individuals from military service has deepened these challenges, sending a harmful message that their service and sacrifice are not valued.

The resiliency of transgender and nonbinary veterans who fought for their country — while simultaneously battling discrimination from within their own ranks — sets a powerful example for young people today.

Their advocacy, lived experiences, and perseverance serves as a source of hope for transgender and nonbinary youth who may feel abandoned by their government. By standing in solidarity with queer and trans youth, military personnel and veterans have an opportunity to shape policies that affirm rather than harm.

How to Support Trans and Nonbinary Youth in This Political Climate

To combat the mental health crisis among transgender and nonbinary youth, we must take immediate action. As affirming adults, we must prioritize:

1. Strategic Action: As recent executive orders attack the rights of transgender and nonbinary youth, federal policy change is unlikely in the near future. Instead, we must focus on state, local, and community-driven direct support and advocacy initiatives. Institutions like schools, workplaces, and community organizations must lead the way in ensuring safe spaces while activist-led advocacy pushes for protective measures at the state and municipal levels. You can get involved in local politics; consider running for positions or supporting/volunteering for candidates who want to help rather than hurt LGBTQ+ youth.
2. Community Support: Schools, churches, workplaces, and community organizations must step up to provide affirming spaces where transgender and nonbinary youth feel safe and valued. You should look at the communities within your spheres of influence to be a voice for trans and nonbinary youth.
3. Military and Veteran Advocacy: Service members with LGBTQ+ youth know the struggles of trying to find support at each duty station. Those who served in the military can use their influence to advocate for inclusion and support within government institutions. Veterans' voices are powerful when calling for change, as they have sacrificed for the nation’s values of freedom and equality. Use your voice if you can.
4. Parental and Family Support: Families must be equipped with the tools to support their transgender and nonbinary children. Organizations like TFSS provide education and resources to help families navigate this journey together. Also, Modern Military offers support groups and resources to assist military families in fostering an affirming environment for their transgender and nonbinary children.

The Path Forward

Trans youth are watching. They see how their government treats them, and they internalize every message — both positive and negative.

Rather than simply praising their resilience, we must create a world where our children do not have to constantly fight for their right to exist.

Let us not wait until another young life is lost to remind us of the urgency of this moment. Let us act now, together, to change the course of history for transgender and nonbinary youth.

About the author

Kathie Moehlig

Kathie Moehlig is the Executive Director of San Diego-based TransFamily Support Services and an outspoken educator supporting transgender and non-binary youth and their families.

A tireless advocate for the LGBTQ community, she was named "Woman of the Year" by California Assemblyperson Todd Gloria and one of the "Best People of San Diego" by CityBeat Magazine. A certified life coach, parenting instructor, and motivational speaker, Kathie's work has been featured in the New York Times, the San Diego Union-Tribune, and NBC News. She regularly crisscrossing the county to work with families, schools, healthcare professionals, and organizations to promote understanding, inclusion, and equality.

Top image: By Meg on Unsplash Photo